me: i swear i'm going to clean. probably while you're gone.
musicboy: whatever. it doesn't matter to me.
me: i feel strangely torn about it. part of me is all responsible wife, who thinks "oh, i must clean and make things neat and cook and do all of those wifely things and i really want to do it!" the other part of me thinks of those things and says "suck it. i'm reading a book and doing nothing."
musicboy: you know, that's really the two sides of you.
me: the responsible and the suck it?
musicboy: yeah. that's really who you are.
me: i know.
the responsible side is winning today, only because i have to grade. but lately, it's a supreme struggle to try to get anything productive done. it's not that i don't want to do it, because the state of my house right now really requires me to pay attention to it soon. it's that...i can't make myself do it. i try, but i have other responsible things to do (i.e. laundry yesterday and buying things like toothpaste and then grading and participating in the online workshop that i'm required to participate it) so that when the time comes to do the other responsible things, all i can muster is an unenthusiastic meh.
musicboy leaves tonight for nyc, where he will be (i am NOT kidding you right now) playing in carnegie hall. the smaller stage of carnegie hall, but carnegie hall. my husband is such a balla.
what will i be doing this weekend, you ask? i'm so glad that you did. i will be staying home, working out, venturing off to the library and such. i will be doing my online teaching thing and i WILL clean this house. i may, however, not go out much. i feel hermit-like but not in a bad way. i may take naps and try a new muffin recipe. who knows? the world is my oyster, if by oyster you mean a small apartment and a desire to not spend copious amounts of money.
wish musicboy luck and send him and his jazz band good wishes. they will have an amazing time in NYC. i am not the least bit jealous, although i do hope i get a little present. :)