Monday, September 13, 2010

when i woke up this morning, i was not pleased that it was monday. i'm not sure i'm ever pleased that it's monday, but i've grown to covet sundays with a fierce unyielding passion that suggests that only that one day of rest will restore the craziness of the week before and prepare both musicboy and i for the craziness to come.

it's my island of not-have-to-do-anything-ness, and i love it and i don't like it to go away.

there's something tremendously difficult about monday mornings, with the wide expanse of musicboy-less-ness ahead of me and the reality that planning and grading and hurtling to and fro will, once more, take over my life.  musicboy just has a beast of a schedule--it's horrific and i am so impressed by his ability to handle it with the grace and panache that he does. he is just the epitome of a TROOPER.

i don't know how i deserve him, but i'm awfully glad he's around.

but i don't see him much, and when i do he usually has a lot of things to get done before he practically collapses into bed.  he, of the blissful sleep, is shortly thereafter off into dreamland.

for me, the hormonal wonder, that's not always true. between having to pee 950 times a day and my recent span of anxiety dreams and just...not being comfortable (i know...the best is yet to come), it's sometimes hard for me to get to sleep.

so when the chirping of some rainforest critters from musicboy's phone tells us that 615 has already arrived, i am not always the happiest camper.  it sometimes all just feels like too much to handle, too soon. 

but today, when i was grumbly for no good reason other than it's monday and i'm tired, my dear husband pulled out the lesson that i had given the 18 month old children in church yesterday.

in his words: "we can choose to be happy, and when we are happy, other people are happy."

while i hate it when he's right, not because i need to be right all of the time or that i resent him being right but mainly because it means that i am so very wrong, he's right.

we can choose to be happy. we can choose to see the good in any one day, whether that day brings us heat and humidity or blissful fall breezes. we can choose to see the good in other people, whether they cut us off in traffic or kindly shake our hand when we meet them in our shared office. we can choose to see the good in a situation, whether that be a really nice office to squat in as an adjunct or the fact that we have a break to eat lunch before heading off again. 

we can choose the good, even when what seems like stress descends upon us. we can choose to be happy, and when we do, we make others happy.

musicboy chose to see the world through his particular brand of optimism today, and he (perhaps unknowingly) fundamentally changed the way i approached my day.

today is made of good, if i choose it.  i'm trying awfully hard. 


  1. I am going to take this lesson with me today, too. Cliche though it may be, this is one of the best parts of having a child around: they require you to slow down and see and enjoy the world.

    I hope you're feeling okay! The second trimester can be blissful, actually. Your energy comes back, and you just in general feel like you're walking on sunshine. :) (It's different for everyone, obviously, but in general you're supposed to feel better than the 1st.)

  2. Keep it up! You'll feel better before long and you'll be happy without having to choose it. I'm here if you need to talk. xoxo