i don't get it.

• you're on a cell phone in a hallway in a building full of academic offices.  the hallways are made of tile, so they are echoey, and they're old, which makes for even more echoeyness.  and yet, you persist in talking at the top of your voice like the phone is from 1963 and is the first incarnation of cellular technology.  it's okay. they can hear you. oh, and guess what? so can i.

• if you think that you are so above the class, and you're happy with just getting by with a b+, why do you ask me about points and grades ad nauseum? why do you even come to class? clearly, you know everything anyway.

• am i invisible? because you clearly didn't mind walking directly in my path so that i had to stop for you. oh, no, it's okay. walking more than half a mile is easy for me right now, especially while hauling a bag full of assorted teaching stuff.  it's okay. i'll wait for you.  oh, and while i'm waiting, let's let this biker not hit me as well.  seriously. am i invisible? because when i left the house, i still had a reflection.

•  you just don't come to class. as in, i haven't seen you since the second week. you don't call, you don't write, you don't show up.  why? 

• you're on a pastry chef reality show and you are losing your crap over some red hots and a grapefruit shortage.  i don't think it's too much to call you mentally unstable. you're the kind of contestant who's going to pull a knife on someone, and i know the producers know it.  you used blue food coloring in your elimination challenge dish, and it looked like smurf poop.  and yet, you are left on the show because you are reality gold.  i hate cynical manufactured reality show nonsense, and yet i keep coming back for more. bravo, i can't quit you.

• i never really wanted a publix sub that much before, but now that i know that i'm not supposed to have it, it sounds like a delicious mecca for my tastebuds.  i could order a hot sandwich but...shudder...that's not a sub.  i've never been a person who wanted something just because she couldn't have it, but maybe i'm becoming that way? 

• how come i go to bed earlier and earlier every night and yet end up going to sleep at the same time? musicboy suggests that perhaps if i turned off the tv, it would help. pfft.  i hate it when he's right.   

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