Tuesday, May 10, 2011

rant on.

may i rant a bit about a few things? i know that they are irrational, which is why i am taking the time in the middle of the night to rant about them here, rather than rant about them anywhere else that i actually, you know, public--because they are stupid and i get it.  so please don't comment to tell me that i am stupid.

1.  i read a blogger who frequently talks about her family and her kids (i hesitate to call her a "mommyblogger" because somehow that term has become pejorative and i don't think that's fair, but she probably manifests the characteristics of said genre in her blog).  she has recently posted about weaning her last child.  the last post was about how tough it was to have SO MUCH MILK and oh my gosh the pain of not emptying her breasts and oh how she's like a carnival sideshow.

now listen. i get that that is probably REALLY painful, and a chore unto itself.  i get that we all have our burdens to carry. but as i am currently pumping my meager ounce or ounce and a half in the everpresent wish to get to something like 8 ounces a day (for some perspective, a mom of a month old should be pumping like 32 ounces a day or something obscene), i find this ANNOYING.

right now, to me, it's like someone complaining about how much money they have and how it's SO HARD to find ways to spend it all.  go cry on someone else's shoulder, buddy, because we aren't buying it over here.

2. i have a facebook friend who frequently just says stuff about parenting that bugs the junk out of me.  i understand that everyone has their own deal with parenting, and i respect the heck out of that.  i just wish this person did.

when maggie was first born, she had a CRAZY suck reflex. as in she wanted to be sucking all of the time and wasn't happy unless she was. so i asked a couple of mothers of newborns that i trust if they had used pacifiers and if they had any trouble with breastfeeding. 

(please note: this facebook friend was not one of those people.)

she saw my post on her newsfeed and chimed in to tell me that my daughter's overactive sucking was because she was hungry and that i should make sure to be feeding her enough.

mmkay. i'll get right on that.

yesterday, she made some comment on someone else's status (a mutual friend) about how much she hated parents who shortened their children's names. why not just name them that, she thought, and i was like "uhm...that's me and my mom" because i have a longer name that i use professionally and for formal occasions and then a shorter nickname that i go by for friends and normal life.  my daughter has the same, because i really like having two names (my longer name also has family history background) because it allows me to have two sides of myself. 

anyways, while i know that wasn't aimed directly at me, i felt annoyed anyways. 

3.  everyone keeps telling me that i look great. and i keep thinking "are you serious?" because i only see the extra padding that's everywhere and that prevents my clothes from fitting properly.  i also keep thinking "great compared to what?" and wonder what the barometer of measurement is.

i also am fairly sure that i just see only the bad in the mirror, and that annoys me. people saying i look great DOES NOT annoy me, fyi.  just that i doubt it does.

4.  i looked at the clock when the baby cried a few minutes ago and thought it was 2:45, meaning that she would have slept 5.5 hours between feedings. musicboy took the feeding and i forced myself up to pump, thinking that it was the middle of the night and i really couldn't wait until the morning because i'd miss prime milk production time.

then i got downstairs and realized that it was only 12:45.  sigh.  oh well.  still counts. 


  1. 1 and 2. I'm so sorry this is happening! I have exactly zero experience in this area, so I won't give you any advice. Instead, I'll say "Wow, people need to mind their own business." Because, you know, CLEARLY you're not going to give your child formula and be sure they're well-fed to supplement any milk supply.

    3. I love shortened names (I married a nickname, after all) and I will either use a nickname or the middle name for at least one of my children (if we have a boy). So, they can suck my big toe.

    4. Those darn digital clocks.

    5. You're not stupid. It's an emotional time, which means that your feelings will run the gamut between ecstatic, sad, frustrated and everything else. I'm here for you!

  2. 3) I completely agree about the name thing. I actually dislike the opposite, when people are just named a nickname.

  3. You've got to stop listening to what stupid people have to say, you're going to get an ulcer. I feel for you and your breastfeeding complications. Its a heart breaking thought thinking you might not have enough to feed her on your own, but I'm sure you know that so many women can't breastfeed for one reason or another and their children are not any different because of it. If you want to breastfeed badly enough then you will keep trying. Take care.