Friday, September 30, 2011

i don't remember when i wrote last. i could look, but i'm lazy like that.

life just keeps moving. magpie is almost crawling. she's teething again. she, on the second go-around, likes bananas quite a lot (especially mixed with cereal) and carrots and i'm not sure that pears are good for her.  she's started bouncing quite a lot in her exersaucer, which creates a cacophony of noise that indicates that no real good can come of it but i am loathe to get another piece of baby gear so we may just live with it. her smiles are generous and she's getting better at getting used to strangers. 

i am taking each week as it comes for work. i am piled with grading but i'm trying not to let it get to me.  i am often tired, but that's pretty normal whether you work from home or stay at home with no job as a mom, so i'm trying not to let that get me down either. 

i'm still the same size and the scale won't move, but i'm pretty sure it's not going to until i'm able to sleep more.  and have the energy to put decent amounts of thought into what i put in my mouth. some days, i'm just grazing because it keeps me going.  sad, but true.

but our life is really good.  i'm married to my best friend.  he loves me no matter what. i have a wonderful family, and a mom who supports me no matter what and doesn't mind telling me when i should probably reconsider what i'm doing because it's bound to burn me out.  i have the most wonderful kid in the world, who really just has fun every day.  even when she's teething and trying to eat the world, she tries so hard to be happy.  i have jobs that support us and i have on-demand on cable so i can spend friday, my toughest day by far because of its length and because of my tiredness, keeping random TV shows going on in the background so that i don't feel quite so much like the only adult in the house for 11 hours. 

she's bouncing again. it's pretty exciting to her. it's pretty exciting to me, too, because it's a developmental thing. it means that she's developing her legs in preparation to walk.  pretty extraordinary.

so i'm tired and i'm busy and i'm bigger than i'd like to be but i'm blessed and we're healthy and i love my family and i feel like i'm standing on my own two feet most days.  some days, i feel like i'm back on my heels, but those days are becoming fewer and fewer.  i know that's not me--i know that's Heavenly Father.  it's a huge blessing.

the laundry is in and maybe i'll find a way to cook tonight.  thank heavens for frozen, ready-to-make meals. i have no idea what i would do without them.  i really, really need to investigate more crock pot meals. 

so sorry for the ramble, but i thought i'd like to express the humble thanks that are filling my heart, even amid my annoyance at not being able to shower without an appointment.  if those are my issues--unwashed hair and gym shorts in a house with a baby who occasionally whines and protests being away from me--then i have it really good.

i'm totally aware of that. 

all is well in collegetown.  i need a haircut, i'm addicted to fiber one brownies, i don't drink enough water, i should probably get out of the house more. but these are not problems.  i think i'm realizing that so many people, despite the veneer of happiness that they show, are facing so much more than i am. that's not to discount my tough times--they are tough, for me--but to simply say that a little perspective doesn't hurt.

blah blah blah.

i am blessed.

the end.

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