there's so much to say.
new baby coming. edd: september 1st (and i totally called that due date, too).
i'm exhausted and stressed.
maggie is all kinds of developing. walking. nearly talking (she has her own language that makes me laugh. i'm constantly asking her "what does that MEAN?!?"). throwing hissy fits when she doesn't get her way. incredibly cuddly. adorable and fun. exhausting.
my husband is amazing. i am in awe of him. he just...is wonderful. and the most wonderful thing about him, right now to me, is that he sees me exactly the way he's always seen me. the fact that my hair is greasy or that i haven't gotten out of my pajama pants all day or that i shower at odd times when it's an option or that i spend most of my evenings in front of a computer grading things or that i am just struggling and it shows in grumpiness or tiredness or just overwhelmingness...none of this seems to phase him. we talked a lot on sunday. i am so grateful for him and for the priesthood that he holds. he is so wise. and he does all he can for me. i think for a long time i tried to be superwoman and do everything myself. especially since i've been pregnant, that just has gone by the wayside. i really just can't do it all myself and some recent events have taught me that putting everyone and everything ahead of me is actually one of the worst ways to try and take care of my family. i never really understood that until recently. now i really do.
i'm sorry the blog is so silent, but i really don't have much screen time that's not full of random 2 minute facebooking or grading. but i'll try to keep you up to date as much as i can.
someday, i have faith that i will get it all together. i'm not sure when that will be, but...it will be a someday. and that someday will be a good day.
in the meantime, i'm trying to make all the days inbetween good ones too. i have variable success.
today, however, was a hard but ultimately good day. that's a good feeling, when you can fight through the bottle refusals and the hissy fits, cry some tears of frustration and think that Heavenly Father must REALLY THINK YOU'RE REALLY VERY CAPABLE OF LOTS OF THINGS, get things done and look forward to the next day's challenges.
that's, i think, the definition of any mother's good day.
(don't ask me about the toys strewn all over the living room or the dishes in the sink or the laundry piled up in the corners of rooms. i have no comment about those. someday.)